My friends said they’re coming to visit me in Napa and I’ve already entered full tour guide mode. The itinerary? Chaotic excellence. We’re hitting three wineries in one day like it’s the Olympics of alcohol. Hydration? Optional. Financial responsibility? Nonexistent. Liver? She’s praying. They think we’re just “doing a little tasting.” Meanwhile, I’ve got a color-coded Google Map, reservations made, and snacks packed like I’m leading a field trip for functional alcoholics. By stop number two, so